STONE COLD HEART

This entry is in keeping with my February theme of hearts and love, but it does not have a flowery, sweet sentiment attached to it. For the heart is not always full of love and kindness, is it?

"Stone cold...and I thought I knew you so well."
I cannot think of anyone I know who has not experienced having a stone cold heart at least once. A heart turned frozen because of the actions of another. For those of us who tend to more easily and willingly share our hearts, having it abused can be devastating. It does not have to be at the hands of someone with whom she was intimate, although it often is. It can be due to a loved friend whose words were poisonous, leaving her with an ice-cold heart.

"Your words like ice fall on the ground, breaking the silence without a sound."
When such a thing occurs, the heart can suddenly grow cold. Very cold. It becomes almost effortless to view the one who caused the damage with a detached sense of dislike. Loathing, even. It continues to remain quite warm and still beats and works its magic for the others we love. It is the person who has tainted it who is the recipient of the crystals of ice.

Deservedly so.

"So many changes, so many lies."
Hearts are not something to be tampered with for the sake of ego, a twisted idea of power or control, or just because it is thought "fun." Not everyone would agree with that. The heart is fair game to them. And for anyone who gives pieces of their heart to those they care about deeply, heart thieves such as those are in their glory. They can snatch and take bits of someone's heart. When circumstances turn sour, they think nothing at all about running off with that scrap of heart and defiling it in whatever manner they wish.

"Oh familiar strangers with nothing to say."
Those who are the recipients of that type of behavior usually react in one of two ways. Their hearts break down and a huge wave of sadness engulfs them, OR their hearts grow cold.

"You're stone cold...ice cold."
My preference is to have an icy heart. There is a clarity that becomes apparent while viewing the hurtful individual through the sharp icicles. It allows me to have a very real, very solid look at the person who has marred my heart. Far better to have that than to be swamped with emotional tears and exaggerated feelings. Yes, the cold heart I develop allows for a more rational, logical, and crystal clear thought process.

"You put me in the deep freeze."
Whether or not a thawing ever occurs towards that person is impossible to say. It has before. If it will again is a question with no certain answer. If I could choose, I would want my heart to remain in a deep freeze concerning the person who violated it.

I believe it is called self-preservation.


(Quoted lyrics from Rainbow's song, Stone Cold)