ANOTHER CANDLE

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FRAMED GLAM~Self-Portrait Challenge, November, Week 4

I am not sorry to see this month's theme come to an end. Portraying myself as glamorous or in glamorous ways is simply not who I am. It is a stretch for me to even view myself in that manner. Yes, I can don the glitter and sparkles and be charming when I am out on the town, but i do not like to think of that as trying to achieve a look of glamour. I view it as only trying to look the best I can.

Hubby just threw a birthday dinner party for me at a swanky restaurant. Because of my dislike to be center stage, he acquiesced to my wishes and only invited my sisters, their husbands, and my mother. We had a private room with every fabulous touch down to the smallest of details taken care of. It was wonderful. It was fun. It was scrumptious.

My mother and I are friends. The best of friends. She had all four of us girls later in life after suffering three miscarriages. Our age difference means nothing and does not interfere with the friendship we have developed over the years. She is a lovely woman who also happens to have manners that would put Emily Post to shame.

And I love her to smithereens. SHE is what glamour is all about, to me. Hers is a quiet glamour. It is not derived from the jewelry or clothing or money she possesses. No, it comes from her being confident enough to wear whatever she wishes regardless of whether or not others will perceive her as looking "so last year" or "frumpy" or any other derogatory adjectives. It comes from the softness of her voice and the kindness she shows others. It comes from her beautiful complexion that is natural and not purchased from a cosmetics department or a plastic surgeon. Her quiet glamour cannot be overlooked BECAUSE of its elegant understatement.

How proud I am that she is my mother. I think you can see that pride in this portrait taken of the two of us at my birthday party, which I framed.


November's Self-Portrait Challenge is: "Lets ditch those imperfections and go all out GLAM. Yes lets glam it up with some disco, diamonds and glitter. I suggest some gorgeous shots - really overdo it on the posing and makeup and dressups and show us the extrovert you. The sexy mama in the kitchen with the peek-a-boo apron or how about some diamontes on those dungarees, stillettos, feathers and lycra. Looking for ideas then go no further than Glam Rock as your inspiration, KISS, David Bowie, and Queen and Garry Glitter. Glam means dressing androgynously in make up and glittery, florid costumes such as David Bowie during his Ziggy Stardust phase or The Rocky Horror Picture Show. Get Glam everyone!"

CHARMED, I'M SURE

"People will believe you when you point out negative things about yourself, but they will not believe you when you mention your positives."

It was several weeks ago that my husband took in my car for an oil change. The following day when I got in and flipped on the music to listen to my CDs, I discovered that he had it set to radio. Because I was trying to navigate the car, I could not fiddle around with the settings to determine how to get it back to CD mode. So, I just decided to listen to the radio for a change.

I was not gone long, but just long enough to know that what I heard on that radio station would at some point become a topic in this journal. A fellow was speaking. The statement he made was the quote above.

It is true, you know. And because of that, I have thought about that sentence ever since that day. Granted, it is a sweeping statement, but a very valid one that is right on the money as it pertains to the majority of people. Such a simple statement that encompasses so much.

How and why do people choose to think you truthful when it comes to your less-than-desirable attributes? Does it make them feel superior for that moment in time? Do they temporarily forget that they have little demons of their own that they continuously battle? Is it because admitting that you have faults allows those you tell to feel important that you confided in them? Does it level the playing field in their eyes? ::Newsflash:: The playing field is never going to be level. It just is not. We are all playing the same game, but the rules for it differ, as do the talents, abilities, and determination of the players.

And just why is it that the good things about people are usually punted aside and deemed lies? Tsk, tsk. Not a very admirable trait. Are people so miserable that hearing something good about someone sends them into a tailspin? Do bitterness and jealousy and insecurity dip their ugly faces into the picture? I think so. After all, when somebody strives to get/be/do something and fails and another person tries and succeeds, then the word "loser" pops into the brain of the unsuccessful. No one shouted out LOSER. It was the one who cannot seem to attain that which he wants who calls himself that name.

It is truly a sad way to live one's life. Why in the world is it so difficult to be happy for others? Why must all the good spoken be called lies?

Let me just put it this way. I have said numerous times in this journal that I have lived and continue to live what I consider to be a charmed life. A fairy tale in a way. And it is the truth. The honest-to-God truth. (See, no lightning has struck me after having said that!) At times, I have even been a little bit embarrassed that my world is full of wonderful people, places, and things. I am loved dearly. That, in itself, is a huge blessing. I have never said that my life has been free of major struggles. But maybe, just maybe, my perception of those struggles is that they have made my life the delicious one that it is right now. My "happily ever after" does not mean there are going to be no worries, crises, or other unpleasantness in my future. It just means that I exist in a real world where I choose to see and revel in the goodness that surrounds me, and I will deal with the worrisome problems as they arise.

If you take a moment to think about the popular fairy tales read over and over again to children, you will realize that almost all of them have good characters who go through difficult times. Their lives are imperfect and often in turmoil. You will also note that there are always dark characters in the story...the ones who wish to destroy happiness for the others. But in the end, the light prevails and the dark is left to fend miserably for itself. Looking at it that way sure makes it seem less like a fairy tale and more like how life really is.

I am who and how I am. The good and the bad. I have some of both. Most people do. I am aware of the bad, and I discuss it. Yet, there is the positive in me that far outweighs any of the negatives. What I share in this journal and with my friends is honest. There are those who cannot be genuinely happy for the good I either possess or receive. For them, it is much, much easier to twist things to make it seem like a fairy tale gone awry. Ah, but that is untrue. And their skewed beliefs only perpetuate their own misery.

I spoke to a friend early in the day. One who has known me for going on three years, I believe. An online friend. One who probably knows more about me than anyone else online. I was talking about the quote at the top of this entry. We chatted a bit about it. I mentioned that at times I am naive, which I thought odd considering I am not naive about human sexuality. This friend said that not only was I naive, but that I was also wise in a lot of ways. An interesting combination, he said. I have to say I was flattered. Being called wise is a compliment, in my opinion. Ah, to be wise all the time and not fall prey to idiocy would be bliss!

When my father was mere months away from death and confined completely to a bed with no ability to lift his head or even move his feet, he was being interviewed. A question was asked about his life. His reply was that he has "lived a charmed life." Sink that into your brain for just a few moments. The man was severely crippled from a ruptured brain aneurysm, had trauma-induced Parkinson's disease from the rupture, was diabetic to some extent, was being fed via a tube in his stomach, fought pneumonia and UTIs regularly, had lost much of his short-term memory, and he was confined to a nursing home and a hospital for just shy of six years. That question was asked, and he smiled and said his life was charmed.

Yes, it is all about perception.

THANKSGIVING

Warm wishes for a safe, loving, and joyful Thanksgiving Day.

Nikki

IT'S IN THE BAG~Self-Portrait Challenge, November, Week 3

Dressed in that perfect little black dress with high heels on my feet and my hair and makeup done just so, these are the final two things I pick up before my nite out on the town. After all, what more does a woman need to take with her than a small handbag and a tube of lipstick?



November's Self-Portrait Challenge theme: "Let's ditch those imperfections and go all out GLAM for November. Yes let's glam it up with some disco, diamonds and glitter. I suggest some gorgeous shots - really over do it on the posing and makeup and dressups and show us the extrovert you. The sexy mama in the kitchen with the peek-a-boo apron or how about some diamontes on those dungarees, stillettos, feathers and lycra. Looking for ideas then go no further than Glam Rock as your inspiration, KISS, David Bowie, and Queen and Garry Glitter. Glam means dressing androgynously in make up and glittery, florid costumes such as David Bowie during his Ziggy Stardust phase or The Rocky Horror Picture Show. Get Glam everyone!"

100 YEARS

Lately, my journaling has taken a back seat to a myriad of activities I have been engaging in. I have a million things to write about, yet nothing to say.

My birthday is Saturday. During the whirlwind of these past weeks, I have found myself thinking a lot about my life. The ups and downs and in-betweens that comprise it. There is little, if anything, I would change about any of it. This "middle time" of my days on earth finds me grateful for all of the small and large events that have occurred and the people who have come into my world. Be they fleeting visits or long-term ones, they are appreciated.

I am neither 15 years old nor 100 years old. At times, I rest somewhat uncomfortably right where I am. Other times, I am at great ease in this particular place I find myself. Empowered in many ways, vulnerable in others. Ah, life.

The lyrics to the following song sum up very well my conflicting emotions:

100 Years by Five For Fighting

I'm 15 for a moment
Caught in between 10 and 20
And I'm just dreaming
Counting the ways to where you are

I'm 22 for a moment
And she feels better than ever
And we're on fire
Making our way back from Mars

15, there's still time for you
Time to buy and time to lose
15, there's never a wish better than this
When you only got 100 years to live

I'm 33 for a moment
Still the man, but you see I'm a they
A kid on the way, babe
A family on my mind

I'm 45 for a moment
The sea is high
And I'm heading into a crisis
Chasing the years of my life

15, there's still time for you
Time to buy and time to lose yourself
Within a morning star

15, I'm all right with you
15, there's never a wish better than this
When you only got 100 years to live

Half time goes by
Suddenly you’re wise
Another blink of an eye
67 is gone
The sun is getting high
We're moving on...

I'm 99 for a moment
Dying for just another moment
And I'm just dreaming
Counting the ways to where you are

15, there's still time for you
22, I feel her too
33, you’re on your way
Every day's a new day...

15, there's still time for you
Time to buy and time to choose
Hey, 15, there's never a wish better than this
When you only got 100 years to live

"A birthday is just the first day of another 365-day journey around the sun. Enjoy the trip." ~Author Unknown

PRINCESS GLAM~Self-Portrait Challenge, November, Week 2

Ah, there are just those times when you feel exactly like a storybook princess. I have been fortunate enough to have had many such times in my life. It is an adventure into long ago and faraway. And all is right with the world.

The following picture depicts one of those magical evenings. (I have recreated it by donning the same dress, jewelry, and wearing my hair swept up and back.) We had a party to attend. A lavish party. A glamorous party. This was not a time to be dressed suggestively, however. It was important to be attired in clothing and jewelry that presented a more proper look. Many people would be in attendance.

My earrings and necklace are rhinestones, yet they fooled people left and right. Never one to pretend something is what it is not, I immediately thanked them and then informed them that they were not real diamonds. Maybe I should have let it go, but it feels right to me not to leave anyone with a false impression. Anyway, I loved how the necklace followed the neckline of the dress.

That evening was most assuredly a gathering of princesses and handsome princes. The only thing missing was a tiara atop my head. ::grin::

And because I am a sucker for making graphics that glitter and sparkle, I have also posted the same picture after I animated it using my animation program.


November's Self-Portrait Challenge theme: "Let's ditch those imperfections and go all out GLAM for November. Yes let's glam it up with some disco, diamonds and glitter. I suggest some gorgeous shots - really over do it on the posing and makeup and dressups and show us the extrovert you. The sexy mama in the kitchen with the peek-a-boo apron or how about some diamontes on those dungarees, stillettos, feathers and lycra. Looking for ideas then go no further than Glam Rock as your inspiration, KISS, David Bowie, and Queen and Garry Glitter. Glam means dressing androgynously in make up and glittery, florid costumes such as David Bowie during his Ziggy Stardust phase or The Rocky Horror Picture Show. Get Glam everyone!"

BALANCING ACT

Sometimes I want and need to be reminded that even the seemingly impossible is possible.

Thank you to my mysterious and good friend for the permission to post this photograph.

Balanced Rock was exposed more than 60 million years ago when the existing Rocky Mountains rose. To make its current shape, the soft bottom layer of shale eroded much faster than the harder sandstone and conglomerate above. Amazingly, the pedestal supporting Balanced Rock has held the 700 ton weight for thousands of years. (Information from The Garden of The Gods Park plaque.)

"Yes, you can be a dreamer and a doer too, if you will remove one word from your vocabulary: impossible." ~Robert Schuller

DRESSED IN SHIRT & TIE...KINDA~Self-Portrait Challenge, November~Week 1

November's Self-Portrait Challenge theme: "Lets ditch those imperfections and go all out GLAM. Yes lets glam it up with some disco, diamonds and glitter. I suggest some gorgeous shots - really over do it on the posing and makeup and dressups and show us the extrovert you. The sexy mama in the kitchen with the peek-a-boo apron or how about some diamontes on those dungarees, stillettos, feathers and lycra. Looking for ideas then go no further than Glam Rock as your inspiration, KISS, David Bowie, and Queen and Garry Glitter. Glam means dressing androgynously in make up and glittery, florid costumes such as David Bowie during his Ziggy Stardust phase or The Rocky Horror Picture Show. Get Glam everyone!"

I laughed while posing for this week's self-portrait. I felt about as dippy as I did when I shut the car door on my head. Bad part is that the latter was accidental; the former was intentional. Ah, the things I do. No telling what will be next on the list.

After reading this month's theme, the following went through my mind: first, I am so not androgynous; second, I do not pile on make up...ever; and third, glam is not particularly a look I have ever tried to achieve.

My mind went completely blank coming up with a single idea, and I thought I might have to skip this month's challenge. Then, I realized how much I do love the comfort of a man's dress shirt. I adore wearing a nice, crisp white dress shirt with skinny jeans or only the shirt...barely buttoned. And from that thought, I came up with this androgynous...kinda...pose. The hubby loved it. He reallllly loved it. ::grin::

This is not glam nor am I wearing any makeup except bright red lipstick and nail polish (which I retained in this black and white shot through the wonders of PSP), but it is my nod to androgony and as close to androgynous as I get. Besides, David Bowie's Ziggy will never be equaled by anyone. A true genius resides within that talented man.

THE REAL BOTCHED JOKE

''You know, education, if you make the most of it, you study hard, you do your homework and you make an effort to be smart, you can do well. If you don't, you get stuck in Iraq.''~Senator John Kerry

He called it "a botched joke." Yeah, right. He scrambled, as well he should have to cover that ketchup covered mouth of his. At first he proclaimed that it was merely a jab at President Bush that he had messed up. The written "joke" was apparently quite a lengthy one. I read the entire joke as it was originally written. It was posted in the news. He left out not only one word or two. No, he left out more than an entire sentence. A good bit more.

Now, oddly enough, his claim is he only left out the word "us." Uh huh. The spin doctors (Kerry's aides) have said he was supposed to say, "...you get US stuck in Iraq." How curious that his original claim was that the joke was longer, but he messed it up. And suddenly now it was just a one-word blooper. Pfffft.

Liar.

The troops deserve better than that. Far better. And apparently the group of military men pictured above made sure everyone knew how they felt about Kerry's little joke in what is a brilliant "biting" photograph. Bravo!

The only joke in this particular mess is John Kerry. And not even a funny one.